4 Hours

Last night I got absolutley no sleep. I couldn't bring myself to close my eyes. Every time I did I got so scared that I bolted up and turned on the light and stayed there, still, until my breathing slowed again. I thought things were okay again and they aren't.
There is a male who used to follow and bother me at work. At first it seemed harmless, then it became more attention than I wanted and I thought I made that clear. I spent some time fearful of leaving my house and then afraid to come back to it alone. Then, slowly, he disappeared and things returned to normal. Until it was brought to my attention a few days ago that a co-worker saw him in the store, fixated on me. She said she ran into him when rounding the corner and saw him, staring me down from afar. I never saw him that day, I haven't seen him in a long time, but it bothers me to know he is around and watching me at work.
Now I can't sleep again. I convince myself that things aren't right in my apartment, even after I check the closets and under the bed a dozen times, I still feel like there is someone else there...
It's the grossest feeling, that you're being watched. I don't think he has ever followed me home and I get rides home when I work late, but still. I can't stay up all night in my own apartment, fearful of, well, of anything. This is my home and I used to feel safe.

There. That's why I deleted facebook. That's why I won't be going out this week. That's why I am grouchy and nervous. It's why I wouldn't recommend surprising or scaring me anytime soon. I refuse to let harm come my way again. I should not be afraid like this. Fear will be a downfall, I have to feel stronger than this... I just can't help it, I feel helpless.
There is this phantom taunting me and I didn't fall asleep last night until I moved to the couch and kept the bathroom light on. I maybe fell asleep around 4, woke up at 8. Running on empty.